sometimes our only way is jumping, i hope you're not afraid of heights

la vita e bella; la vita e amore.
-- life is beautiful; life is love. 

they say that love is a leap of faith.  well, i guess i've never been inspired to jump.  without explanation, i've successfully avoided companionship for years.  maybe it was fear of co-dependency.  maybe it was habit.  i've looked after myself for a long time, and had become quite happy with my life.  anytime a potential mate surfaced, i would dig around to find something wrong with him and call it quits without second thought.  nothing ever felt right, not even the "practical" men who i "should" like.  i have never been able to fake emotion to myself or another individual.  it's not in my pisces blood.  i was beginning to think i would never have that spectacular love that some people have, and i was ok with that. 

after participating in a spontaneous cross country set up, my life has changed forever.  i have learned that true love comes without warning.  it comes without banners or flashing lights.  i have also learned that this kind of certainty comes only once a lifetime.  and it feels so good.

the past two weeks have been the most pleasant ongoing breath of fresh air.  this companion of mine has added to my already existing happiness and brought my elation meter to a level that i thought was unattainable.  i have learned more about what it should feel like to love an individual in the past two weeks that i have in my entire life.  it's not two halves that make a whole....it's two whole souls whose lives gloriously come together and compliment each other in the most beautiful way.

our first date was one of the most incredible experiences of my life.  i have always wanted

to try skydiving, and without knowing that, he suggested skydiving over the rockies while we were visiting friends in denver (on our "cross country set up").  little did i realize at the time that the act of jumping out of a plane would mean more than just a crazy adrenaline rush.  

right before jumping out of the plane, i surprised myself and was as calm as a snoozing turtle/excited to try this new adventure.  i honestly thought i would be slightly afraid.  i have come to realize that i have spent years fearing companionship.  from the instant i met my new delicious companion, i have been nothing but excited.  excited to learn all about him, excited to spend time with him, excited to kiss him, excited for everything!

as i was free falling, i noticed that i continued to pick up speed towards the earth (so fun!).  there was also this tranquil beauty in the earth below and the mountains across the horizon.  another symbolic coincidence.  every single day with my companion gets better and better, 

even though we are separated by distance.  i honestly feel like i am free falling faster and faster, yet there is still a calmness there that is so comfortable.  it's not that crazy infatuation that leaves every other aspect of our lives dormant, no, it's so much more than that.  he makes me want to be the best me i can be in all areas of life.  it is the most refreshing, comfortable, passionate and meaningful feeling i have ever felt towards someone.  

i am so grateful that i executed this jump.  

listen to:  Taking Chances by Platinum Weird...."what do you say to taking chances?  what do you say to jumping off the edge and never knowing if there's solid ground below, or a hand to hold, or hell to pay....what do you say?"